What's this blog about?

As a result of a combination of factors, culminating in the shameful UCU boycott-in-waiting of Israel, I've grown alienated & silenced, working here in one of the UK's finest universities all the while feeling like a Boycotted British Academic, alone in facing some dilemmas of the moment. In this generally chilling environment, it's hard to speak out and be heard, and hear others...and I find myself writing this blog.

What's it about? At present, it seems to me like a rather tortured articulation of the state of being silenced & mute, beyond words; struggling for the right even to use them, for a voice which can still be heard. When it started, all those successive boycott motions ago, I'd hoped it would function as a blog forum of support & solidarity amongst academics similarly-situated to BBA, to help us break through the boycott movement's silencing strategies. That hope remains notwithstanding this silence... Perhaps it lives in trying to articulate beyond the filter of these coping mechanisms of old (denial, avoidance, withdrawal); by way of this labour of finding the words, this voice...
[A forum of sorts has also arisen in the blog's comments, in which others have adopted the BBA moniker in case of need (e.g.
here
and here exposing the racist hate speech which masquerades as UCU solidarity activism).]

Wednesday, 20 February 2008

I'm Back!

First, BBA's free wifi went on holiday. Well, one of BBA's neighbours must have gone on holiday with their wifi in tow. Note: BBA did not go on holiday. BBA does not remember the last holiday. Alright, that's an exaggeration - BBA remembers it well and longingly as something which happened a very, very long time ago. Certainly not the summer last, spent, very exclusively, getting way too acquainted with the thoughts and arguments (more accurately: some bastardized approximation of the same!) of some seriously messed-up boycotters.

Then, BBA's computer took sick leave - the whole thing went to pot. BBA seems to have taken leave of a similar nature, in one way or another. The computer's still bust and I'm writing this from a borrowed computer. The desktop at work - being, well, at work - is not a suitable substitute in my boycotted state since I've grown to limit time spent on my toxic, hate-filled campus to a strict minimum. It's inconceivable that BBA would have survived long had BBA had to be at work for computer use (an activity which keeps BBA busy for pretty much the entire time - with the advent of the boycott, ridiculously so!) and instead BBA has been rediscovering how liberating pen & paper can be when working through a difficult argument (not forgetting the scissors & tape!). None of which is much good for blogging, hence the non-posting, for which I apologize profusely...

I wish, in addition to a better loaned-computer, I could also borrow another me, better in the sense of being able actually to live the life I'm meant to lead since BBA does not seem to be able to do it anymore really. Perhaps something like a Stepford Wives equivalent of BBA who just smiles and takes it (on the understanding, of course, that I'm the one controlling the humanoid robot of me!).

Anyway, I just wanted to let y'all know what's been going on, especially since some sorry souls have started to post nasty comments on here and I don't want to leave the impression that I feel boycotted even from this blog! The non-blogging is not causally related...

The comments are for the rubbish, of course, as the wonderful Anthony Julius reminded us recently (if you want to listen, turn up the volume to max - his hilarious spin on rubbish is roughly at 04:10 for a couple of minutes or so). As Julius recalls, in closing (14:10ish): rubbish is rubbish, but the history of rubbish is scholarship. So, in the interest of any such scholarship, the comments will remain for posterity.

And, to let y'all know... I'm back! (I hope?!)